Tungsten Will Melt in Your Mouth!

But, of course – it won’t.
But let’s imagine that it were in someone’s financial – hell, geopolitical! interest – to convince the public that it will. The New York Times editorial might go like this: ’you may have heard of tungsten, a metal, just like gallium; the latter, a favourite among stage magicians for melting at body temperature…’
Now, it [...]

A Country of Which Nothing is Known but the Name.

If you came here via a search engine, you were probably looking for Pierre Cartier’s wonderful mini-biography of the mathematician Alexander Grothendieck – from which I shamelessly stole the title. Please go straight there. Otherwise…

“And so no one, except for two people, enters the top floor of the Aedificium. …”
The abbot smiled. “No one should. [...]

Don't Blame the Mice.

Your kitchen is alive with vermin! Who is to blame? The cruel forces of nature? Or, might it be you – the fellow who scattered delicious crumbs everywhere; spilled honey a thousand times without picking up a mop once; and kept a mountain of old newspapers around for rodents to chew into nest liner? [...]

On the fact that Bitcoin has a Kill Switch; and how to disconnect it.

“There are three classes of people: Those who see. Those who see when they are shown. Those who do not see.”
(Attributed to Leonardo da Vinci.)
It is widely understood that early adopters of Bitcoin, who showed up on the scene in the days when mining difficulty was low, are sitting pretty, and will continue sitting pretty [...]

Shitcoin: a Modest Proposal.

This post is of interest only to those who study Bitcoin. If you have never heard of Bitcoin, read my previous post on the subject.
Shitcoin is to be a distributed network for attaching “dirt” to particular bitcoins when certain conditions are met, in a manner which allows Bitcoin users to post bonds in [...]

The Ultimate Cross-Platform Malware

The Mac Defender trojan scare confirmed what everyone has suspected all along: that Apple’s products are vulnerable to malware after all!
But we can do better than that!
My new Computer Defender trojan, working on the same proven principles as Mac Defender, will eagerly attack a Mac, a PC, Commodore, Lisp Machine, UNIVAC, arithmometer, and just about [...]

Posted in: ModestProposal, NonLoper by Stanislav 6 Comments

Steam Lisp

How many of your waking hours have you wasted in babysitting machine processes which ought to be entirely hidden and automatic?  In the use of “job-creating” technologies?
Next time you find yourself doing so, consider this:
“Improvements come in many ways, sometimes after much thought and after many experimental failures. Sometimes they flash upon [...]

Of Weighty Matters, or Thumbs Still Down for Clojure.

Ah, Clojure.
The nice, clean replacement for Common Lisp — as some would have you believe.
I haven’t forgotten about you.
Clojure is a nice, clean replacement for Common Lisp only if thumbs are nice, clean replacements for cars.
But wait, we’re dealing with something more than a mere lightweight hitchhiker on the JVM:
“…Clojure’s [...]

Posted in: Distractions, Lisp, ModestProposal, NonLoper by Stanislav 24 Comments

No Formats, no Format Wars.

Computer users are forever being misled, successfully lied to, sold “old wine in new bottles,” bamboozled in a myriad ways large and small.  Why?  Simply because we are, to use the technical term, suckers.  Not always as individuals, but certainly collectively.  The defining attribute of the sucker is, of course, an [...]

On the Insanity of Computer (in)-Security.

Forget for a moment about the security of your computer.  Instead ask yourself: how secure is your body?
Don’t ask a computer security “professional.”  Instead, ask an anatomist.  Or better yet, a trauma surgeon.  Or a prison medic.  A weapon no deadlier than a pencil, driven through soft flesh into your abdominal [...]

Posted in: Hot Air, ModestProposal, Philosophy by Stanislav 10 Comments
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